Turn that criticism upside down.

I'm thankful for getting things out in the open. I'm thankful for being able to get over myself and becoming malleable enough to be able to change. Criticism isn't a bad thing. It seems harsh at first but after the initial sting of being told, it's worth it. Why is it hard to hear it from people like family? Probably because while they are throwing that stuff at you, you are throwing stuff they do wrong back at them. It stinks that it's hard for us to lay down our pride with people like them.

My pride is screaming, don't talk about this! Don't let anyone know you have problems! Don't change, you have nothing to change about yourself. Just go on thinking that everything is fine or even when it's not that it's ok that it's this way. The two biggest faults I'm dealing with now are:

I have a problem with putting up a hard exterior. It may come up because I've been hurt or I feel insecure. Whatever the reason, I do.

I come off like I think I know more than people. Or when I'm trying to say something it sometimes comes off as "holier than thou". With my family I come off like this as well as with other people. It's gay, and I hate how it is.

Ecclesiastes 8:1
Who is like the wise man? Who knows the explanation of things? Wisdom brightens a man's face and changes its hard appearance.

Matthew 18:1-4
At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" He called a little child and had him stand among them. And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

I know I have faults. I know I have tons of them. And I'm not glorifying myself by saying that I'm trying to change them. I'm humbled that they were brought to my attention. I'm hurt that I've hurt people but I'm willing to try to change. Actions speak louder than words, so I'm going to work on it. I'm sorry if I've ever hurt anyone that may read this because of my selfish/human-ness stuff. If I have, bring it to my attention, I want to work on it.