What About Now?

edittttt///// - I listened to this on the radio and stuff and I guess it sounds like a boy/girl thing. Haha, I was thinking about it with the actual official music video. Go look at it if you haven't seen it. I guess it could be seen in many ways, but that's how I saw it at first. The, "what if our love never went away?" to me means our love for people not in a person...haha, anyways just wanted to say that. :)

This is the Church I'm talking about. Though the person that made this video did a lousy job in my opinion, aha. It was the only one made that I could use because the actual music video has it's link enabled. Living in Christ together and letting the Holy Spirit fill us with compassion to move and be that church is where my heart is. It doesn't matter where you are as long as that's where the Holy Spirit wants you to be in that moment. I'm learning that control is a huge thing in my life that I've been dealing with. And in that control leads to trust. "You say life is waiting for the ones who lose control." I've realized that I have a hard time giving up the control in my life because I don't trust God enough with it. I tend to make decisions based on what I can do in my own strength or by what would be easiest.

I'm learning that sharing life together and being accountable to each other and really building those relationships that will be there regardless of where people are at on Sunday mornings (I'm just using that as an example) or what people are going through is where true change and growth will come. I don't want friendships that are dependant on if I'm doing something of the status quot and the minute I'm not I'm dropped. I want Christ to be the center of all my friendships with my brothers and sisters, not church or school or whatever the case may be.

This song was number one on VH1 this morning. My sister was watching it as I came home from the prayer walk. I'd never heard it before and watched the whole thing. I was in awe that it got number one and started to think about why it was number one. I think people want to make a difference. I think people want a chance to step out of their comfort zones and be better than who they are and who they know they are in themselves. I think people really want relationships that will be there and people that they can go to with anything they are going through.

Romans 12:9-10
Don't just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.

As I've started to trust God with my every day He's been giving me opportunities to step out. Sometimes I take them and sometimes I don't. But I'm growing relationships with people that are based on the fact that I love them. I wrote something in English class that talks about standing in a doorway. Maybe I'll put it on here but it talks about my journey to the doorway first. It talks about how I've been training for this from the inside out, how He has been working in me & how I know that He will be with me as I go out the door. In the story I finally take the step to the doorway and I look out. I see all these people. It's like I see their lives. Some walking about aimlessly, some sitting and talking with people; tons of scenarios and situations. It's like God is giving me His eyes, to see all the people around me. As I'm watching them I know God is telling me to step out and to go to them, to love them the way He loves them, but I'm scared. I hesitate to take that step because that means that the control that I had would be gone. But as I stand there I realized that I was never really in control. The control I thought I had was just my best attempt at doing things on my own. Then I hear a whisper that He will be with me as I live in Him. He will give the the words and He will be my guiding way. So with new confidence, I take that step out.

This blog is sort of all over the place but I'm learning a whole lot lately and all I want to do is give God each day as it comes, and really trust Him as each new opportunity arrives. :)