Stand up, break free. Oh gee.

I can't hold it anymore. Nope. I let it go. It's out of my grasp. I can't even finger it gently with the intent of trying to fix a thing. It's not mine. And their will be ups and their will be downs. But it's their decison. And I have to be ok with that. Mhm. (easier said than done.) No worries for me.

I got my hair done today. And she also did some cool stuff to my hair, and I think I got what I'm gonna do with it for prom down. (: I'm excited!

I've been in an aware-ing mood lately. A teacher in one of my classes is pretty much a chill guy who lets our class have talking time. You know the churches that everyone goes to & it's the 'church to be'? Well there is a lot of people that go to that church in there. And I've been sitting back listening to the conversations (not easedropping, the conversations are pretty open for everyone to hear) and it blows me away about the thought that struck me. I was watching that group interact with the group that dosn't go to church at all. And you know? There was no difference. There was no difference in the way they acted and what they talked about. I just sat back and wondered. Wondered not only about that, but what I could do and should do. I know I need to be more outspoken about what I believe and I wish I was. But it's hard when you're the only one. It really feels like I am. Especially in that class. Heck, there is even someone that goes to C3 in that class that wears the c3 stuff but is the biggest one talking about the dirty jokes and telling about starbursts and gross college stories. I can't even imagine what kind of impact he would have if he was on fire for Christ. (I don't think any of the people in that class would ever read this, that's why I'm not afraid to write it all.) I just wish I could have that kind of impact. And I wish that I would stand up more. It just is really hard when you feel like you are all alone. Like, I have no idea what to say and when to say it. I guess I'll just have to ask God to give me certain times to stand up, it's just gonna be hard. Ah, it'll happen. It's just not good enough to be different and to not conform to what everyone else is doing by cussing or talking crap about other people or whatever else. I feel like I need to do more than just that. Hm.

Now - homework time. Latterrrr. :)